His Perspective
Every morning i wake up before the sun rises. I see the sun rise from my window with my blurred vision. I hear people getting up in the house and moving about, brushing their teeth, cooking breakfast, sweeping floor. Then my wife comes and helps me to sit up and drink water. My son comes and helps me with morning chores.
I am taken on the wheelchair to the breakfast table and i try to eat with my unsteady hands. My son ties a bib around my neck to prevent my clothes getting spoilt. I am wheeled back to the bed where i lie down till lunch time listening to my grandchild play with my wife. I hear his voice, his laughter. Once in a while he come to my room and like always i try to extend my hand for him to hold. But before he can notice the hand moving, he runs away to play some other game.
Once again i am wheeled to dining table and i eat lunch. My wife sits by my bed and talks to me about everything that is happening around. I have stopped replying as no word i speak is clear enough to understand. I like her sitting with me for 1 hour. I catch some sleep.
My son comes back from office in the evening and sits and chats with his mother and wife. He always comes and spends some time with me. I see him and remember the days when he used to come to me for guidance.
I mostly try to skip dinner but the family ensures that i eat atleast something.
I was an IAS officer. I always kept my head high and feet on ground. I did good to many people without expecting rewards. I was respected. I was honored by the government of India. People were told to follow my example. And here i am now. A grand old man who cant even visit the loo himself. Who cant even say two comprehensible words.
Everyone cares for me no doubt but then all i have become is a burden. A burden that my family is carrying without any grudge, perhaps they dont mind it at all. But then i am a burden on myself.
Death would be better. Atleast i wont have to see each part of me, each belief of mine dying every passing minute.
Death would certainly had been better.
I am taken on the wheelchair to the breakfast table and i try to eat with my unsteady hands. My son ties a bib around my neck to prevent my clothes getting spoilt. I am wheeled back to the bed where i lie down till lunch time listening to my grandchild play with my wife. I hear his voice, his laughter. Once in a while he come to my room and like always i try to extend my hand for him to hold. But before he can notice the hand moving, he runs away to play some other game.
Once again i am wheeled to dining table and i eat lunch. My wife sits by my bed and talks to me about everything that is happening around. I have stopped replying as no word i speak is clear enough to understand. I like her sitting with me for 1 hour. I catch some sleep.
My son comes back from office in the evening and sits and chats with his mother and wife. He always comes and spends some time with me. I see him and remember the days when he used to come to me for guidance.
I mostly try to skip dinner but the family ensures that i eat atleast something.
I was an IAS officer. I always kept my head high and feet on ground. I did good to many people without expecting rewards. I was respected. I was honored by the government of India. People were told to follow my example. And here i am now. A grand old man who cant even visit the loo himself. Who cant even say two comprehensible words.
Everyone cares for me no doubt but then all i have become is a burden. A burden that my family is carrying without any grudge, perhaps they dont mind it at all. But then i am a burden on myself.
Death would be better. Atleast i wont have to see each part of me, each belief of mine dying every passing minute.
Death would certainly had been better.
posted by Kush at 11:26 AM
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